How It All Started Pt. 2: That Was Then, This Is Now
Before I begin I’d just like to say I feel like it took me forever to write this post. There were so many scenarios that would go though my mind as I would think about how to write it, but sometimes the best way to write something is to just let the words flow from your brain onto the page, so that’s exactly what I did.
The funny thing about being in the sex work industry, is that romantic relationships take on a whole new dynamic, or at least for me they did. It was August 2020 when I decided to leave my husband. If you read my last post you know the first half of the reason. The second half is where it gets interesting.
Leaving my husband was extremely confusing, and traumatic. It turned my life upside down, but most of all it was tremendously liberating. A bit of a recap to that situation is I got married in 2017 before I even became a dancer, then started dancing shortly after which would be followed by camming due to moving half way across the country. If you want more of the gory details, you should read my last post. What appended in August of 2020 is the straw that broke the camels back.
For the sake of keeping this post short and on topic I’ll shorten the story down to the following: I found out that my husband had been cheating on me since before we even got married. Now, you’re probably wondering what all of this has to do with being a sex worker right? Well, all of this comes into play because as a sex worker with a “supportive” spouse you would think that it would make them proud of being with you, like it might even make your relationship more exciting right? Well, not for me. At the time my husband used it as an excuse to gloat about what I did for a living despite my explicit request to not mention it without my consent because the last thing I want is for someone to make assumptions about me based on their ignorance regarding the industry. At the time my husband also used what I did for work as an excuse to not help pay bills and instead go out partying. I even found out he would spend thousands on escorts. Upon discovering all of this I was mind boggled.
Now that its been a couple of years, Ive had plenty of time to sit back and think about all of this, and have an abundance of conversations about it with other sex workers as well. I now know there are a few different ways the partners of sex workers react to being in a relationship with a sex worker. All of which have a number of factors, but over the years of having conversations with sex workers, and customers Ive noticed there are specific patterns. But all of these patterns very depending on a number of factors we can go over in the next post.
